An eighteen-year- old boy was drinking in a bar. He asked
an older man sitting next to him, “I want to learn all about women.
What do you call that little magic button in a woman’s slit?”
“A clitoris.”
“What’s the brown part around the nipples?”
The older man replied, “That’s the areola.”
“Wow, you know everything,” the boy said.
“How about that smooth patch
of skin between a woman’s cunt and her asshole?”
The older man thought for a moment, then answered,
“I don’t recall the scientific name. But most of the fellas
around here call it a fuck’n chin rest.”
July 26, 2008
Categories: Funnies . Tags: pics & toons . Author: lefturn . Comments: No Comments
“I always worry when you leave for a weekend with the guys,” sobbed the pretty young wife. ”Don’t worry about me, babe,” he soothed her. “I’ll be back before you know it.” “I know,” she sighed. “That’s what fucking worries me.”
.
July 25, 2008
Categories: Funnies . Tags: pics & toons . Author: lefturn . Comments: No Comments
The drunk staggered up to the hotel reception and demanded his room be changed. “But sir,” said the clerk, “you have the best room in the hotel.” “I insist on another room!!” said the drunk.”Very good, sir. I`ll change you from 502 to 555. Would you mind telling me why you don´t like 502?” asked the clerk. “Well, for one thing,” said the drunk, “it’s on fuck’n fire.”
July 24, 2008
Categories: Funnies . Tags: pics & toons . Author: lefturn . Comments: No Comments
The angry wife met her husband at the door. There was alcohol on his breath and lipstick on his collar. “I assume,” she snarled, “that there is a very good reason for you to come waltzing in here at six o’clock in the morning?” “There is,” he replied. “I want fuck’n breakfast.”
July 23, 2008
Categories: Funnies . Tags: pics & toons . Author: lefturn . Comments: No Comments
Sadie and Sophie are sitting at the kitchen table, bragging.
“My daughter lives in a penthouse apartment in Miami,” says Sadie. “She goes out to dinner every night at a different restaurant, has beautiful furs and clothes, and lots of boyfriends. “ Sophie replies, “Yeah, my daughter’s a fucking whore too.”
http://www.imagebeaver.com/view.php?mode=gallery&g=577884
July 22, 2008
Categories: Funnies . Tags: pics & toons . Author: lefturn . Comments: No Comments
As John and Jill parked in a crowded lovers lane, Jill sighed romantically: “Its lovely out here tonight just listen to the crickets.”
“Those aren’t crickets, ” John replied. “They’re fuck’n zippers.”
.
.
There is a problem with the Image beaver but it will be up soon, I hope.
July 21, 2008
Categories: Funnies . Tags: pics & toons . Author: lefturn . Comments: No Comments
“God damn! What the fuck happened to you?” the bartender asked Kelly a he hobbled in on a crutch, one arm in a cast. “I got in a tiff with Riley.” “Riley? He’s just a little fuck,” the barkeep said, surprised. “He must have had something in his hand.” “Aye, that he did,” Kelly said. “A shovel it was.” “Dear Lord, didn’t you have anything in YOUR hand?” “Aye, that I did — Mrs. Riley’s fucking tit.” Kelly said, “And a beautiful thing it was, but not much use in a fight!”
http://www.imagebeaver.com/photos/574436-.html
July 20, 2008
Categories: Funnies . Tags: pics & toons . Author: lefturn . Comments: No Comments
Did you hear about the stressed out Priest who went to the Doctor in a panic and asked him, “What does it mean Doc, when I go pee it burns like the Fire of Satan and I have this God awful drip?” The Doc,smiled and said, “It means the alterboy lied. He wasn’t a Virgin.”
.
July 19, 2008
Categories: Funnies . Tags: pics & toons . Author: lefturn . Comments: No Comments
Mike picked up an attractive woman, named Linda, who flagged down his car in a seedy part of town. As they rode, he asked her what she did for a living. Linda winked at Mike and said, “I’m a magician.” “No way,” Mike scoffed. ‘Prove it.” So Linda touched him on the thigh, and “Poof” Mike turned into a fucking hotel.
http://www.imagebeaver.com/view.php?mode=gallery&g=571716
July 18, 2008
Categories: Funnies . Tags: pics & toons . Author: lefturn . Comments: No Comments
A couple is lying in bed. The man says, ‘I am going to
make you the happiest woman in the fucking world.
The woman replies, ‘I’ll miss your ass…’
July 17, 2008
Categories: Funnies . Tags: pics & toons . Author: lefturn . Comments: No Comments